NYC Midnight Microfiction Challenge 2019, Round 2: “Before the Church Crowd Shows Up”

I told her not to do it, but three mimosas later and here we were. In a church parking lot on a late Sunday morning, with Janet trying to hot-wire her ex-boyfriend’s car. 

“I bought him this car, you know,” she stated holding onto open wires in her capable hands as a YouTube tutorial talked her through the steps to turn the car on. I winced at all the wires poking underneath the steering wheel and studied Janet. She looked comfortable amongst the wires, but her hair was a rat’s nest, and last night’s make-up smeared under her eyes. “Then he cheats on me and—now I’m taking it back!”

I nodded through this apparent breakdown, my heart pounding against my ribcage. I was there for support. As my best friend stole a car. No worries.

“What time does church get out anyway?”

It was almost eleven. “I’m not sure, dude, but I think—“

A knock sounded on the driver’s side. We looked up to see Roger, the ex, standing by the door surrounded by confused and contemptuous church members. “What are you doing?”

Busted. Or were we? Janet was still crossing open wires, saying to Roger, “I’m not sure what you mean, babe. I’m just—“ A spark and the car roared to life. Janet rolled down the window just enough to stick her finger through. “Taking back my fucking car.” The faces of seemingly innocent church-goers dropped in horror. I cackled as the tires spun us out of there.

This piece was for the second round 250-word NYC Midnight Microfiction contest. So far, I’m really enjoying myself. I received feedback from my last piece, Saturated, and everyone seemed to really like it. This one had to be a comedy, with the action of someone stealing a car and the word ‘nest’ in it.

I was super nervous to write it because I don’t think I’m funny, but hey? A brash young woman giving people the finger on a ripe Sunday morning in a church parking lot got ahold of me the night I sat to write this baby and told me it was going to be hilarious. I suppose it’s up to you, reader, to let me know if I did the job! Either way, wish me luck and hope I make it to the third round. (:

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